


Sacrifice

by GeeKnProuD



Category: The Avengers (Marvel Movies)
Genre: Angry Sex, Arguing, Crush, F/M, Oral Sex, Rough Sex, Unrequited Love, slight daddy kink
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-01-23
Updated: 2019-01-23
Packaged: 2019-10-13 20:19:04
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 8,734
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17494658
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/GeeKnProuD/pseuds/GeeKnProuD
Summary: Nova was a very rational and level headed person. She never made a decision without thinking it through. Maybe that’s why she’s so pissed off at Steve Rogers right now. His knack for self sacrificing himself was getting on her last fucking nerve!She tried to rationalize her anger on the fact that he’s a hero and her superior in all the ways that matter, unofficially of course. That he’s more important to the world to just throw his life away.Or maybe it was the fact she was secretly in love with the irritating bastard and almost lost him. No that couldn’t be it at all.





	1. Lamb To The Slaughter

Nova

 

I was stewing. The temperature inside me slowly rising to the point of feeling like I was going to explode. 

And it was all his God Damn fault!

Steve Fucking Rogers! 

A whole year we all suffered when the Snap happened. Losing so many people we loved or cared about. No one was left unaffected. 

No one. 

Clint lost his whole family. I knew that kind of pain. No wonder he went off on a killing spree to settle some old scores. He’s lucky he came out of that alive. 

He definitely didn’t come out the same person. 

Those of us left behind, after the initial shock wore off, worked night and day, trying to think of a way to reverse what happened. 

I think Rogers worked hardest of all, guilt driving him on. He never said anything, he didn’t have to. Nat and I could see it in his eyes when he thought no one was looking.

He blames himself. 

We all in our way tried to tell him this wasn’t his fault. There was nothing anyone of us could have done to stop the mad Titan from doing what he did. 

Not even Captain America.

No one called him that anymore, not after the Snap. Some even before, since his and Tony’s falling out.  

He didn’t even want anyone calling him Cap. I knew it was because it reminded him of Tony and Sam. So he just became Steve. 

Nat and I got into the habit of just calling him Rogers. I had started it first. She asked me about it one day, why I never called him by his first name anymore. 

_“I was there Nat, when it happened, when Bucky disappeared. I saw the look in his eyes as Bucky called out to Steve. Saying his name. I see the pain in his eyes when anyone says his name. I just want to lessen that pain, any way I can.”_

I think that’s when she realized the depth of my feelings for him. Not that I’d admit it to her, or anyone else for that matter. 

Especially to Rogers himself. 

No, I kept those feelings to myself. He never needed to know how deeply in love with him I truly was. 

Why? Because he doesn’t want my love. Or anyone else’s for that matter. He’s made that abundantly clear. 

Any attempt to show him affection of any kind had his hackles up. 

I know, because I tried.

We were sitting together on the roof one night, a few weeks after the Snap. He was drinking whiskey with some of Thor’s Asgardian Meade mixed in. The only thing that could ever get him drunk. 

He wanted to feel numb. I knew the feeling. When I’d lost my family long before the Snap, I too tried to lose myself in the bottle. 

He was drunk, I knew I shouldn’t have done it, because I was drunk too. But I did it anyway.

I kissed him.

He had let my lips caress his for a few moments, even slightly pressing further in to me. Then he grabbed my arms and pushed me away from him.

His eyes held such a darkness to them, and so much pain. I’ll never forget the words he told me that night. Never. They play over and over again in my dreams at night.

_”Don’t. Just don’t. This won’t happen, ever again. Not with me. I’m not meant to. Not now, not ever.”_

It hurt. A lot . But it didn’t stop how I felt about him. Nor did it stop my loyalty to him.

It’s why I never hesitated in going with Rogers when he left with Bucky after the fall out. I was never as close to Tony as I was him. There was never a choice to make.

Even before I loved him. 

I would follow him anywhere, even into the jaws of death. Which is exactly why I’m so fucking pissed off right now.

The self sacrificing Bastard! 

Thor had found Tony almost at the point of death, floating around in a spaceship. Bringing him home was the catalyst in finding the answer to the questions we’ve all been searching for.

How to bring everyone back.

Turns out, they weren’t dead. They were trapped. The Soul Stone was the answer. 

Just like Thanos had to sacrifice someone he loved to gain access to the Stone, a sacrifice had to be made to bring them all back.

Rogers decided for everyone, without discussion I might add, that he was the one to be sacrificed. 

As if his life didn’t have a purpose except to be the perfect sacrificial lamb to the slaughter. 

It cut me to my very core.

The thought of a world without him in it, made me want to throw up. And I almost did when I saw him run toward the dropped gauntlet once Thor managed to slice through Thanos’ arm with Storm Breaker and then successfully kill him.

We all saw it on his face. 

He was determined to lay down his life, literally for half of every life in the Universe. 

Noble yes. Brave, no doubt. Stupid as fucking hell, absolutely!

The bastard never gave us a heads up on what he was doing. My heart fell as I screamed his name. Running toward him to try and stop the inevitable.

What Rogers didn’t realize was that Quill had decided the exact same thing. To be with Gamora. 

He got to the Gauntlet first. Removing the stone, he held it in his hand and with the other, stabbed himself in the heart with Gamora’s own weapon. 

A flash of light had us all covering our eyes, the brilliance of it so powerfull that it made us all briefly blinded by it. 

Then it was over. 

A silent moment turned to gasps of shock as one by one, our friends and family were restored to us. 

I sat there on my knees, tears pouring down my cheeks as I watched. 

Vision and Wanda appeared and seemed dazed at first, only to embrace each other and kiss. Their love for each other abundantly clear.

I watched Rogers nearly stumble back and gasp as Bucky reappeared a few feet from him. 

Barnes seemed confused too, looking himself over as if to make sure he was all intact. Then he looked up and saw Steve. He smiled.

_”Hey punk.”_

_”Bucky?”_

I watched them embrace, shock still on Rogers face that he finally had his best friend back. He had everyone back.

All I could do was sit there on my knees. The one man I wanted to embrace never even looked my way. 

No one looked my way. 

It was all too painfully clear I had no one before the Snap. Or after apparently. 

A voice beside me made me startle. 

_“Can you not find who you lost? We can help if you want.”_

Watery eyes looked over at Rocket.

With me on my knees, we were nearly the same height. It still felt strange talking to a Raccoon, but then again, nothing makes sense anymore.

I gazed out at everyone embracing and crying happy tears. 

_“No, they’re all there.”_

He looked up at Groot, scratching his face and grimacing before speaking again.

_”So, uh, no one, you know, looking for you?”_

Groot nudged him slightly,  _“I am Groot.”_

Rocket rolled his eyes.

_”I am being sensitive! I got Thor to talk didn’t I?”_

I wiped my eyes and watched Rogers smiling and hugging Sam, even hugging Tony. 

_“No, no one looking for me. Excuse me.”_

He and Groot argued as I got up off the ground and walked away.

I knew despite it, Rocket was glad to have him back. 

I was glad everyone was back. It just made it all very painfully clear that I was more alone than I was with half the Universe gone.

I sucked up the pain inside and walked toward my friends. Greeting each one with a smile and a handshake or hug. 

Inside I felt like I was dying, yet burning up with rage all at once. 

Nat saw me and smiled, only to frown slightly as I darted my eyes quickly away. Of all people, she was the one who could read me the most. 

I made my way back to the Quinjet, avoiding anyone if I could. I just couldn’t stand to look at all the happy faces anymore. 

I definitely didn’t feel, happy.

I’m not sure how long I sat in the jet, before the others started piling in. Laughter and chatter filled the close quarters. 

My hands worked the controls and started up the engine, waiting for orders on where to go next. I had to try and control how badly they were shaking.

Nat came up to the copilot seat and sat down.

_”Hey.”_

I couldn’t even look at her, my emotions way too close to the surface. I needed to focus on a job, anything but the deep ache in my chest. 

_“Want me to fly, so you can tal..”_

I knew she was only trying to help. 

I interrupted her and quickly wiped at a stray tear and finished the flight check list before closing the ramp.

_”No, I got this, thanks anyway.”_

She nodded once and stilled momentarilly before heading in the back with the others. 

Rogers came up to the front and placed a hand on the seat I was in and leaned over, bracing his other on the control panel. His shadow casting over me.

” _Nova, take us home. Tonight we need to celebrate, don’t you think?”_

He looked down at me and I couldn’t resist looking up into his hypnotic blue eyes. 

His smile faltered and a small frown began to form.

” _Yes Sir. Ready to take off when you are Captain.”_

There’s no way he didn’t hear the change in my demeanor. I’ve never been that formal with him.

Except for maybe when I first met him. He had quickly put a stop to it. Insisting I call him Steve.

I saw him out of the corner of my eye watching me. My body tensing even more. 

After a few more moments I was relieved that he went back with the others and left me in peace. 

If he stayed any longer, I feared I’d rip his throat out.

I never spoke a word the entire way back to the Avengers Compound. Thankfully, no one bothered me. I probably had Nat to thank for that. 

I heard her behind me, telling someone, I don’t know who,  _“Not really the best idea right now, trust me.”_

The moment we landed, I felt a deep need to pound something bloody. My temper so wound up that I was nearly trembling with it. 

Light hearted laughter rang in my ears from Rogers as he and Bucky gathered up some gear to take inside. 

I stormed past him, nearly knocking him over as I pushed between the rowdy crowd to get out of the jet. 

Walking quickly, I wanted to be away from it all as quickly as I could. 

Only he wouldn’t let me.

A hand grabbed my upper arm and pulled me around. 

Rogers, of course it would be him.

Nat jogged up, alarm on her face.

_”Rogers, I said just leave her alone.”_

So he was the one she was talking to. 

I jerked my arm free.

_”Don’t fucking touch me!”_

His eyes widened and everyone around us froze. Eyes wide as they watched the interaction.

_”What is wrong with you?!”_

I scoffed and pushed him hard away from me. Only really making him take a slight step back. I’m not super short, he was definitely a good six to eight inches taller than myself. 

_“You know damn well what’s wrong! Now leave me alone!”_

I turned to walk off and I could hear him following me. Anger boiling over in my veins, making my teeth clench and my hands ball up into fists. 

I wasn’t surprised that the moment we got back inside, he grabbed my arm again and made me face him. 

Except this time, I was ready.

I quickly spun around and punched him.

Hard!

Sam hissed,  _“Damn!”_

This time he did stumble back, eyes wide as blood trickled out of his split lip. His hand came up and swiped away the blood. 

Rocket nudged Bucky’s leg.

_”You still got that gun, you may need it. Looks like she’s gonna kill your boy toy there.”_

Bucky rolled his eyes and stepped away from him.

” _He’s not my boy to...you know what, forget it. Steve! Just let her go man. Leave it alone. Give her some space.”_

I stood there with a heaving chest and fists ready for a fight. I wanted to kick his God Damn ass!

” _No Bucky, I’m not just gonna leave it alone. We finally get everyone back  and she’s not even happy about it. I’d like to know why?”_

I growled out in anger and swung at him again. This time he was anticipating it. 

He caught my fist and held it tight, only to have to block my other fist as well. 

I was screaming like a wild woman and kicking at him, tears streaming down my face.

_”You God Damn idiot! I fucking hate you! Hate you!! Why? Why did you do it? Why?!”_

Everyone watched as he tried to subdue me, scooping me up with his huge arms and holding me tight to take me inside the building. 

The entire time I was screaming obscenities at him. 

Thor’s eyes went wide, looking down at Rocket.

_”Has she been conversing with you Rabbit? Her knowledge of the verbal tongue lashing is quite extensive.”_

Groot nodded.

_”I am Groot.”_

_”Agreed Tree, a very bad influence.”_

Rocket raised his hand and opened his mouth to argue, only to shrug and except that they might be right.

Everyone followed us inside where I was unceremoniously dropped down onto a sofa.

I rebounded and kicked out, narrowly missing hitting Rogers right in the dick. 

Sam, Bucky and even Scott Lang all hissed at the close proximity. Actually covering their own manhood out of some inner pain at just the thought of it.

Rogers grabbed my leg and then the other as I tried to kick him again. 

_“For fuck’s sake Nova! Stop!”_

Several people gasped at his cursing. 

Rocket spoke up loudly.

_”Not my fault! I swear!”_

I was wrestled into submission, my arms pressed beside my head on the couch, his large body closing me in to stop my flailing. 

Since I couldn’t move anymore and fight. I broke down and sobbed. 

Through my tears I saw the pain on his face as he gazed down at me. 

The room was deadly silent. 

Tony reached out and put a hand on his shoulder.

_”Let her go Cap.”_

It wasn’t an order. He said it gently, trying to convince him that I was done fighting. I was utterly and truly broken. 

Everyone there could see it. 

So could he.

He slowly let me go and kneeled in front of me, his eyes soft and full of concern.

_”Nova, talk to me, what’s wrong?”_

His concern for me only broke me further. I covered my face and cried harder. 

His warm hand stroked over my hair and I jerked away from it like he had burned me. 

_“Don’t touch me! Don’t you ever touch me! How could you? How could you just try and sacrifice yourself like that?”_

His eyes widened and I heard Tony tell Bruce,  _“Bingo! Told you so.”_

I sat up and pulled my legs up to my chest. I needed it to try and feel like I was holding myself together in some sort of way. 

_“Nova, it was the right choice. It needed to be done. I couldn’t let anyone else go, not after all we’d lost. It had to be me. I have no one here, my life ended back in the forties where it should have when I buried myself in the ice. It was the most logical choice to make. Unfortunately, Quill beat me to it.”_

I pounded his chest with my fists and cried out.

_”Everyone lost someone they love in the Snap! But me. I lost my family years ago! But when you ran..when you tried to sacrifice yourself...You Bastard! I felt that pain all over again. You ripped my heart in two and you don’t even care! You don’t even know!”_

He pulled me to his chest as I sobbed, holding me tight, my hands clinging to the tattered remains of his tactical suit, afraid he’d disappear and I’d never get to touch him again.

Rocket could be heard shooing everyone out of the room.

_”Go on you idiots, this isn’t some kind of show. Now move it or I’ll take my new Vibranium arm and smack you with it.”_

Bucky groaned on his way out.

_”You can’t have my arm Rodent.”_

Rocket grumbled under his breath.

_”Oh I’ll get that arm pretty boy.”_

If I wasn’t so wracked with sobs, I probably would have laughed. 

 

Long moments passed and my sniffles soon turned into silence. Rocket the ever loving Captain had made sure we had some privacy. 

I pulled myself away from his chest and knew I was royally fucked. Not only did I physically attack him, but I also pretty much confessed my love for him. 

In front of everyone. 

Well, when you’re gonna fuck up, you mine as well do it with flare. 

_“Nova, why didn’t you say anything? You should have told me.”_

I pushed my way past him and off the couch, needing to distance myself from his warmth and smell.

_”I did try. You didn’t want to hear it. You..you rejected me.”_

I could hear the confusion in his voice. He stood up and rounded the couch, coming toward me.

_”What? When? When have I ever rejected you? Nova, if I had known...Sweetheart, If I had known you had feelings for me...”_

I spun around and saw his look of pure shock, complete confusion written all over him.

_”You did know. That night on the roof a year ago. I told you. I kissed you. You pushed me away. Told me it would never happen. Not with you.”_

He looked like he’d tasted something sour, his mind racing to try and come up with why he couldn’t remember. 

His eyes suddenly widened and realization hit him hard.

_”The night I got drunk.”_

I nodded to confirm what he’d remembered. 

He growled in frustration.

_”God Damn Asgardian Meade! I swear on my mother’s grave I’m never touching that stuff again!”_

He rushed toward me and I backed away, hitting the wall by the window, making him stop in his tracks.

_”Nova, please, listen to me. That night. I was in a really bad place. I took solace in alcohol to numb the pain. God knows what came out of my mouth. I’m so sorry. All this time, I wish I’d known. God if I would have known..”_

_”You would have what? Let me down easier? Trust me, it would have hurt just as badly.”_

He stepped closer and the look in his eyes made me let him. He approached me like a scared deer, ready to bolt any second. 

Maybe I was.

_”No. I would have told you how much I loved you too.”_

My heart stopped. Ok well, not literally, obviously. I’d be dead. But it felt like it.

_”Wh..what?”_

He stood before me, reaching out and cupped my cheeks, his thumbs wiping away moisture as tears escaped my eyes once again.

_”I love you Nova. I should have told you a long time ago. But the thought of losing one more person I loved...It made me hold my tongue. Everyone I ever love seems to be taken away from me in some form. I figured if you didn’t know, then maybe you wouldn’t end up with the same fate.”_

I couldn’t believe it, all this time, he loved me too. 

He loves me!

Oh God! He loves me!

My voice quivered.

_”Steve..”_

He pulled my face toward his as he bent down. My eyes fluttering closed as I felt his breath on my skin. 

My body shivered when his lips touched mine. 

The kiss was tender and gentle at first, a brush of his lips against mine. It was as if he were testing out the waters, so to speak. 

He tilted his head for a better angle. I gasped when I felt the warm press of his tongue on my bottom lip. 

He was asking for permission.

I gave it and opened up to him.

I couldn’t stop the low moan that left my throat. He answered with one of his own. 

His hands left my face and pulled my body flush to his. His body heat permeated through his and my tactical suits. I felt like I was burning.

But in a good way. Not the burning rage coursing through me just minutes before.

My hands that had been gripping the straps on his suit, released their death grip on the leather. I placed my palms on his cheeks, feeling the softness of his beard.

Sliding my hands into his hair, I moaned at how soft it was. I loved the longer look on him and it felt even better.

He shuddered as my nails scraped across his scalp, pulling his lips from mine.

When I didn’t feel his lips return, I opened my eyes and saw him staring at me. 

His breathing was labored and a flush of heat was across his cheeks and down his neck. Lips pink and swollen, wet from our kiss.

He was so damn beautiful. 

_“Nova?”_

_”Yeah?”_

_”I’m so sorry. I’m sorry I hurt you.”_

I saw true remorse in his eyes, but I still couldn’t help but keep seeing him running toward the gauntlet.

His eyes widened as I pulled away from him. He almost looked panicked.

_”Would you do it again?”_

He frowned and seemed to realize what I was asking him.

_”If I knew how you felt about me, I don’t think I could.”_

I gave a nod, thankful that at least he would have made a different choice. It didn’t stop the fact it still haunted me that he was willing to just die.

He tried to reach out to me again and I backed away from his grasp. 

_“Nova?”_

_”I’m sorry too Steve. But I need some time. I don’t think I can be with someone that is willing to just throw himself on a sword without little feeling as to what that would mean to the ones left behind.”_

He lowered his gaze and gave a nod of understanding. I truly hope he did.

” _I still love you Steve.”_

His body twitched as if he had wanted to come to me, but held himself back.  He was at least respecting my boundaries.

_”I love you too.”_

My bottom lip trembled and he looked tormented by the fact he caused me pain. 

I turned away and wrapped my arms protectively around myself. It felt as if it were the only thing holding me together at the moment. 

Reaching out, I took hold of one of the double doors leading out of the room. Pulling it open, I gasped as Sam and Bucky fell into the room. 

They had obviously been listening to our conversation. Of course they were.

Bucky quickly got to his feet and blushed furiously at being caught. 

Sam just laid in the floor and looked up at me with a smile.

_”Hey Nova, how you doin girl?”_

I rolled my eyes and stepped over him to leave. I didn’t have anymore fight left in me. Not even to admonish those two for ease dropping. 

All I wanted to do was go to my quarters and go to bed. 


	2. Sexual Healing

Steve

 

My heart felt like it was breaking, watching her leave. But there was nothing I could do. 

I leaned against the wall and eyed Sam and Bucky as they came toward me.

Bucky sighed. His eyes showed compassion for the obvious pain I was going through.

_”Sorry Steve.”_

Sam leaned against the wall beside me, crossing his arms.

_”So, what’s your next move?”_

Pushing away from the wall, I shook my head and headed off to my own quarters. 

“ _Nothing I can do. I screwed up.”_

Bucky rolled his eyes and blocked my path out the door.

_”Well, obviously. Not the first time you did something stupid.”_

_”Move Bucky.”_

_”Hell no! Don’t just give up on her Steve. She loves you. You love her. You gotta make this work. Jesus! Do you know how long I’ve waited to see you settle down with a nice Dame?”_

I tried to walk around him, only to find Sam blocking my path as well. 

I groaned and ran my hands through my hair in frustration.

_”What the hell can I do? I told her how I feel. I hurt her. I can’t force her to be with me.”_

Sam scoffed and nudged Bucky.

_”You hear that Bullshit Bucky? There’s nothing he can do. Man, I thought you taught this punk about women better than that.”_

Bucky smirked.

_”Wasn’t for the lack of trying. I can tell ya that. He never was good with women. I’m surprised she even fell for him to tell you the truth. Although it was probably the puppy dog eyes. Yeah, that’s gotta be it. Or the beard. Yeah, definitely the beard.”_

I rolled my eyes at him. I knew they were in their own way trying to help me, but for the life of me I couldn’t see how they could.

_”Alright, oh wise ones, what should I do then?”_

Bucky grinned and looked at Sam, the gleam in their eyes told me that whatever they were thinking was probably going to get me either in trouble or deeper into the dog house.

After an apparently nonverbal conversation, the both looked at me and blurted out at the same time.

” _Fight for her.”_

They were both nodding like it was the best idea ever.

_”Fight for her? Exactly how should I do that? Especially when she made it abundantly clear she needed time and some space. I think I should just give her what she wants.”_

Sam snorted in annoyance.

_”Man, time and space should be left up to Strange and Thor. I know that’s what she asked for, but it’s not what she means. She wants you to prove how much you care about her.”_

Bucky nodded and agreed with Sam.

_”Exactly! It’s like when a woman says she’s fine. You know damn well she isn’t fine. So, logic would tell you that since she’s asking for space, you need to do the opposite. Go to her. Fight for her. Make her know how much you love her.”_

I frowned in confusion. It can’t be that simple, can it? Do women really say the opposite of what they mean? No! It can’t be.

_”Ok, let’s say for a brief moment I believe you. Exactly how do I make her know how much I love her?”_

Sam wiggled his eyebrows suggestively.

_”Do the deed my Man, sleep with her. Rock her world.”_

Bucky and Sam laughed and high fived each other. 

Juveniles.

Bucky laughed at my horrified expression.

_”Come on Steve, you know you want to. Just, you know, do it. I could give you some pointers if you’re nervous.”_

Sam rolled his eyes.

_”Don’t listen to this Neanderthal, he’s bound to tell you to get a big stick and club her over the head. Then drag her back to your man cave. No offense Bucky, but dude you’re fucking old Man, he needs a more younger and smoother teacher in the ways of love making.”_

I truly can not believe I’m standing here having this conversation right now. Though I couldn’t walk away. 

One, because I was actually hoping their advice might work. And two, I’m so damn happy to have them both back that I’d listen to anything they wanted to tell me.

_”Yeah, ok Bird brain, har har, very funny. He’s about the same age as me, so shut up. Steve obviously don’t use a stick. But she loves you, she’s attracted to you. Seduce the hell out of her punk. Kiss her till her knees give out. I’m sure things will move swiftly along after that. Let nature take its course.”_

That’s their big plan? I’m suppose to what? Go to her quarters and grab her and kiss her senseless. Push her against the nearest wall and have my way with her?

My eyes widened as the image of just that entered my mind. Damn! 

_“By God Bucky, I think he finally gets it. Look at him, practically drooling already. Just remember protection. Don’t be a fool, wrap your tool. No glove, no love.”_

My cheeks heated up. Good Lord.

Bucky shrugged.

_”Or, you know, use the pull out method. That’s always worked fine for me in the past. Can’t beat a classic.”_

Sam frowned and looked at Bucky like he’d grown another head.

_”How the hell have you not knocked up a woman yet? It’s astonishing really. Seriously Steve, do not use the pull out method. Unless you want to be called Daddy.”_

Bucky’s face lit up like Christmas.

_”Oh! That could work too! Not the knocking her up part obviously, but you know, have her call you Daddy. Oh yeah, that really gets the Dame’s juices flowing, let me tell ya.”_

Sam burst out laughing.

_”Nova? Calling him Daddy? I think not. Although...oh man, make her call you Captain! Oh yeah, I bet she’d be into rank kink. Be dominant, from the look of her kicking your ass earlier, she may like it a bit rough.”_

How in God’s name am I actually listening to these two? I don’t have a clue.

” _She definitely likes it rough.”_

All three of us froze as Tasha came walking in, steaming cup of tea in hand. 

Sam pursed his lips and looked cocky.

_”See, told ya!”_

I looked nervously at Tasha as she sipped her tea and watched us. An amused expression on her face.

_”How much of that did you actually hear?”_

She gave that toothless knowing smile. 

“Let’s just say I heard enough. You boys need to stay out of Steve and Nova’s business. Oh, Steve, definitely don’t do the pull out method.”

I blushed furiously. She winked at me then headed over to the couch to finish her tea.

Sam looked down right proud of himself.

_”I rest my case.”_

I made a quick exit, my face burning so much from my blush that I just knew I looked like a tomato.

I didn’t know exactly what I would do. But I had to admit they were right about one thing. I needed to do something. 

 

Nova

 

I woke up from a nap, which apparently I needed badly. The whole day has been emotionally and physically exhausting.

Though to tell you the truth, I wasn’t expecting to sleep for three hours. 

The battle with Thanos left me filthy, I definitely needed a shower. 

I stripped out of my uniform and walked into the huge shower in my bathroom. 

The hot water washed away all the blood, dirt and grime. Too bad it couldn’t wash away my heartache.

I felt horrible for walking away from Steve. I wanted to stay with him and continue kissing those amazing lips. 

After being in love with him for almost four years, I felt like my head was spinning, knowing he feels the same.

God I wanted him.

I want him.

If he had tried to take me right then, I would have probably let him. But my stupid brain got in the way. 

How can I be with a man who will just give up his life so easily? I’d always be in fear that the next time something dangerous happens, that he’ll do it all over again. 

I couldn’t bare it if I lost him. It nearly killed me today seeing him running toward the gauntlet. It was like my whole world came crashing down around me.

Now I needed to try and put the pieces back together. 

Figure out what I’m going to do. 

A part of me wilted that he let me go so easily. Perhaps he doesn’t love me as much as he claims. 

After my shower, I wrapped myself in my red silk robe. It only came to mid thigh, but the material was heavenly on my skin. 

I was blow drying my hair when I thought I heard a knock at my door. 

I turned off the dryer and waited. Nothing. I must be hearing things.

Turning back on the dryer, I continued with my task. I heard the knock again, louder this time. More insistent.

Ok, I didn’t imagine that.

I turned off the hair dryer and made my way to the door. It was probably Nat checking up on me. She always does that, especially after particularly hard missions. 

Today would definitely count as one of those.

I opened my door and my eyes widened in surprise. Instead of a sultry red head, I was staring at the most beautiful thing I have ever seen. 

Steve. 

He must have showered and changed because he was clean and wearing dark jeans and a blue button up that matched the perfect shade of his eyes. 

The sleeves were partly rolled up his arms and I swear the shirt had to be at least one size too small. Not that I was complaining.

I definitely wasn’t.

My whole body tingled from having him just a few feet away from me.

_”Steve? What are you doing here?”_

He said he would give me my space and time, yet here he is. 

My heartrate spiked anyway.

_”I’m sorry Nova, I know I said I’d give you time, but I needed to do something to prove to you how much I love you and that I’ll never throw my life away like I’ve done in the past. Like I did today. The only thing I could think of was this.”_

He pulled a small wrapped rectangle box out of his back pocket. 

He held it out for me and I took it from him. I couldn’t fathom how jewelry could make me know his sincerity.

I sighed and tore open the shiny silver paper, letting it fall to my feet. My curiosity definitely getting the better of me. 

The moment I opened the box, my eyes welled up with tears. I looked up at him and he stepped through my door, closer to me. 

_“They’re yours now. I want you to keep them.”_

I wiped away a tear as it slid down my face. Inside the box was Steve’s Dog tags. 

Growing up in a military family, I knew what the significance of this was. 

No soldier would ever go into battle without their tags on. 

He was giving his to me. 

I was confused at first, though touched that he would willing give them to me. 

_“You have my tags now. A soldier will never, never leave his tags behind. Ever.”_

I finally understood. He was telling me, showing me, that he would never leave me. 

Tears slipped down my cheeks as I pulled them out of the box, setting it’s container on a small table by the door. 

With shaky hands, I lifted the chain up and over my head. Putting the tags on. 

My robe was loosely tied and plenty of my clevage was showing. His tags settled on my chest and in the valley between my breasts. Right over my heart. 

My voice cracked and I needed him in my arms. 

_“Steve.”_

He reached out and pulled me to him, my chest pressed against his own.

His voice was deeper and his eyes were clouded over with lust. 

_“Nova, please...I need you.”_

A sob left my throat and I nodded.

_”God! Steve, I need you too.”_

He groaned as his lips devoured mine. 

Pushing my body further into my quarters, he slammed the door shut behind him. 

I had asked for space, but instead he pulled me as close as I possibly could get. His hands roaming my back. 

I didn’t want space anymore. I needed him, desperately. 

He seemed to need me just as badly. I could feel this erection through his jeans.

I gasped as he spun me around and pressed me against the door, the kiss turning hungry.

He pulled back slightly and looked down my body, our kissing had made my robe pull open even farther.

Reaching up, he took the dog tags in his right hand and pulled, bringing me closer to kiss me all over again.

I could feel my pussy practically dripping with arousal. 

A gasp left my lips as his left hand gripped my right outer thigh and pulled it up onto his hip. He pressed himself into me and I whimpered, loving the feel of his body.

His hand slid up my bare thigh, straight to my naked hip, then around to my ass. He groaned into my mouth as he palmed the flesh and gripped me harder. 

Without warning, he held tight to my waist and outer thigh, lifting me up off the floor. Instinctively I wrapped my other leg around his hips and clung to him as he carried me back to my bedroom.

I have wanted this day to come for as long as I’ve known him. So many nights spent dreaming of this. Wanting this, needing it.

He didn’t stop until he had me pressed into the center of my bed. His large and powerful body draped over mine. His hips positioned between my thighs, driving me mad with want.

He trailed open mouthed kisses down the column of my throat. He hit my sweet spot and I moaned and pressed my body up into his. 

He stayed there for what felt like an eternity, driving me wild with his lips and tongue. A violent shiver wracked my body as his teeth scraped over the sensitive area.

_”Oh God! Steve!”_

He pulled back and I regretted ever moaning out his name because it made him stop. I didn’t want it to ever end. 

Propping himself up on one hand, his right pressed to my sternum. With lust blown eyes, he trailed it down my chest, between my breasts and across his tags. 

He slowly parted my robe, pulling the tie free and finally exposing my fully naked form to his eyes. 

They danced over my figure and I couldn’t stop the whine that left my throat. His eyes shot up to mine. 

My God! The intensity of his stare was enough to set me on fire. 

I cupped his cheek, trying to guide his lips back to mine. Needing to taste his lips again like I needed air to breathe.

He resisted the pull and instead, leaned down and kissed between my breasts, just above his tags. 

My hands tangled in his hair as he turned his head and kissed the side of my breast. Trailing his lips slowly toward the hardened peak.

I felt a rumble in his chest as his eyes closed and his lips wrapped around my sensitive nipple. 

I moaned and arched my back, the sensation his mouth was creating made my pussy ache and burn with the need to be filled. 

He didn’t just stop at the one. Once he was done with one breast, he graced the other with the same attention. 

He was slowly driving me insane with just his mouth. 

Slowly he crept down my body, tasting and kissing a scalding path down my stomach and belly. 

His tongue slipped inside my belly button and I nearly came undone. I had no idea it was so sensitive, or perhaps it was just because it was Steve that was doing it. 

I looked down and his full attention was on his task at hand. Just like anything he does in life. He had a look of determination as he headed toward his goal.

Which apparently was to make me go insane with need. 

His large hands skimmed my sides and then hips, gripping me hard as his mouth reached my hairless mound. 

His hot breath against my core nearly did me in. My head was thrown back in anticipation, needing to feel something, anything against my aching pussy.

He didn’t make me wait long. I cried out and nearly came up off the bed as he placed a kiss directly onto my clit. 

My head jerked to look down at him as I heard and felt him chuckle against me. He had a shit eating grin on his face. 

With his eyes locked onto mine and his hands keeping me in place with his enhanced strength, he licked a stripe from my opening to my clit, flicking it with the tip of his tongue. 

_“Fuck!”_

When I heard his small laugh again, I looked down at him.

_”You look awful proud of yourself Captain.”_

Something flickered in the depths of his eyes and a crooked grin lifted one side of his mouth. 

“ _Very. Agent.”_

Oh Jesus! The way he said Agent made my thighs try to clench together to relieve some tension. His firm grip prevented me from moving at all. 

I made a sound halfway between a squeal and a groan as he dove back in. His tongue circling my entrance as his nose nudged my aching clit.

I didn’t know how much more of this I could take. He’s barely touched me and I could already feel that I was extremely close to cuming.

My hands gripped his hair tight, tugging and pulling. His tongue delved into me and lapped up my arousal. He hummed out his enjoyment, the vibrations doing amazing things to me. 

He pulled up slightly and looked directly into my eyes. He wrapped his lips around my clit and sucked it gently into his mouth and flicked it rapidly with his tongue.

_”Holy Fuck!”_

Without much warning...I came.

He held me down and lapped at the juices that flowed out of me. A growl rumbling his chest and the bed.

I’m not sure how long I laid there, panting and feeling my heartbeat pound in my ears.

I finally opened my eyes when I felt Steve kiss my forehead. 

Fluttering my eyes open, he smiled down at me. The bastard looked cocky and so damn proud of himself. 

_“Jesus, Mary and Joseph! Where the hell did you learn that?”_

He shrugged and blushed.

_“Does it matter where I learned it? Do you really want to know?”_

I shook my head.

_”Uh, nevermind, I’d rather not hear about your other sexual conquests.”_

He blushed even redder.

_”There aren’t any other conquests. Just you.”_

My eyes widened. Was he serious? He’s never been with a woman before? He’s a virgin?!

_”Just me? How is that possible? You know what, it’s not important. Are you sure you want to do this? I can wait if you’re not ready.”_

His smile made him look so much younger. 

He was propped up on his left elbow. His right hand slid up my side and cupped my breast, raking his calloused thumb across my nipple.

_”I’m tired of waiting. I want to be with you. I’m more than ready.”_

He emphasized his point by pressing his pelvis into mine. The rough material of his jeans combined with how hard he was, made me whimper with need. 

_“Oh thank God! I was just bullshiting you about waiting. I think I might spontaneously combust if I don’t have you inside me soon.”_

He leaned in and placed a gentle kiss to my lips before pulling back and kneeling between my thighs.

It dawned on me as I looked up at him, he still had all his clothes on.

His hands went to pull his shirt from his pants. I quickly stopped him.

_”Wait! Um, can I do it?”_

He paused his actions and gave me a heated look.

_”Only if you ask nicely.”_

OH, I like where this is going. For someone with no experience in the bedroom, he was doing fucking amazing!

I pulled myself up and slipped my robe completely off my shoulders, throwing it to the floor beside my bed. 

His eyes trailed down my body. He worried his bottom lip between his teeth. The look he gave me was as if he wanted to eat me alive.

Walking on my knees, I came to kneel in front of him. 

I gripped the fabric of his button up and pulled it free of his jeans. One by one the buttons were undone.

Placing my hands inside his shirt, I drew them up his chest and over his shoulders, pushing the shirt off his body. 

I swallowed hard.

I’ve seen Steve without a shirt on several times. But being able to touch him was a whole other matter. 

He shuddered all over as I stroked his soft skin. Tracing the ridges of his abs and across his pecs. 

I enjoyed every second. I could feel his strength below my fingers and palms. His biceps flexed as I moved over them.

_”Enjoying yourself Sweetheart?”_

_”Oh yes, very much so. I could do this all day.”_

I didn’t have to look up at his face to know he was smiling. 

I heard his breath hitch as I reached the top of his jeans. His stomach muscles twitching slightly as I unbuttoned them.

I peeked up at him as I pulled down his zipper. His eyes were intense and his breathing had picked up. I couldn’t wait to get my hands on him.

From the look of his bulge, he had to be packing. 

Once everything was undone and loosened up, I slid my hands under the hem and played with the sensitive skin of his happy trail.

_”Steve, can you stand up for me?”_

He nodded and got up off the bed, coming to stand next to me.

Turning toward him, I began to tug down his pants and boxers all together. 

I moaned as he sprung free. 

Oh he was definitely packing some major heat! 

He helped to remove the rest of his clothes and seemed to not know what to do next. Standing before me with a blush spreading down his neck and chest. 

I giggled and sat down on the edge of the bed. His cock standing proud right in front of my face. 

I watched him and listened to ever sound he made as I took him in hand. Stroking his cock from base to tip. 

_“Jesus!”_

His hips cantered toward me, unable to help himself. His body was flushed with his arousal. 

I needed to taste him.

His eyes had closed when I took him in my hands, but as I drew the tip of his cock into my mouth and swirled my tongue around it, his eyes flew open.

_”Christ Nova!”_

I giggled around his cock as I pushed him further into my mouth. 

He made a choking sound and deep moan followed. 

He suddenly gripped my hair and tugged slightly.

_”Sweetheart, I’m barely containing myself right now. If you keep doing that, I’m going to lose my mind and it will be over before we even begin.”_

I slid off his member, giving it a kitten lick on its tip. His whole body shivered from head to toe. 

_“Well, I guess you better hurry up and fuck me then, don’t you think...Captain.”_

He growled deep in his chest and reached out, tackling me to the bed and kissing me passionately.

His cock grazed my clit and I jolted against him. 

_“Steve! Please! God I need you inside me!”_

He positioned himself at my entrance,  the head spreading my lips. 

He froze and his eyes looked up at me with a look of unease.

Did he change his mind?

_”What? What’s wrong?”_

He blushed and ran a hand through his hair.

_”The, uh, condom, it’s in my pants pocket.”_

I glanced over to where he had pitched his pants onto a nearby chair. 

_“There is no way I’m letting you pull away from me right now. Forget the condom. We don’t need it.”_

He looked alarmed.

_”Sam said to not use the pull out method.”_

I laughed. I couldn’t help myself. 

_“Oh, Baby, that’s so cute. It’s nice that you’re thinking about this. But you don’t need to worry. I have us covered. I’m on birth control.”_

He laughed at the awkwardness of the situation.

_”They didn’t tell me that was on option.”_

I pulled him down closer to me and gently kissed his lips.

_”Get inside me soldier, that’s an order.”_

He groaned.

_”Yes ma’am.”_

His entire body tensed up as he pushed inside me. A deep moan left his throat. 

When he was finally as deep as he could go, I clung to him and wrapped my legs around his hips. 

He was thick and long and the stretch was slightly painful. So in essence, the best damn thing I had ever felt. 

I couldn’t believe I was already on the verge of another orgasm. Just from him entering me.

I looked up at him. His eyes were tightly closed and he almost looked to be in pain. Sweat beading on his forehead. 

_“Steve, Baby, what’s wrong?”_

He made a slight whimpering sound.

_”So..so tight. Trying not to..God, you feel so good. I don’t know..if I can stop.”_

He was about to cum. I could feel him throbbing. 

Pulling him down to where my lips were slightly touching his ear, I whispered to him.

_”Let go Baby. Give it to me. Hard. Fuck me Steve.”_

The moan that left his throat was so deep and erotic. 

His nerves melted away and his instincts took over.

I cried out as his hips pounded me into the mattress. All I could do was hang on for dear life. 

His right hand gripped my outer thigh and pushed it farther up, going even deeper if it was possible.

I cried out and arched against him as I came hard. 

The bed banged against the wall, the rhythm faltering as he orgasmed shortly after I did. His lengthening mine and going into a second one that snuck up on me.

He melted against me, face buried into the crook of my neck as his breathing tried to return to normal. 

I cradled him to my chest, threading my fingers through his sweat damp hair. 

He lifted up and kissed me. Pulling out, he groaned at the loss of my warmth. 

He laid down beside me and curled me against his chest. Kissing the top of my head, he stroked my back and held me so tightly. 

His chest was rumbling and shaking. I looked up at his face to see him laughing. 

_“What’s so funny?”_

_”You do like it rough.”_

I’m not sure where it came from but I couldn’t help but laugh along with him, his laugh was infectious.

_”I think I need to have a conversation with Sam and Bucky about talking about my sexual tastes.”_

Steve kissed my forehead and tried to stifle more laughter.

_“Just be thankful I didn’t use a club or make you call me Daddy.”_

I gawked at him and propped myself up on his chest, watching him laugh harder. 

_“Oh I beg your pardon Sir, you did use a club and I substituted Daddy with Captain.”_

His laughter stopped immediately. 

I winked at him and then snuggled into his chest.

I burst out laughing as I heard his breathy curse.

_”Holy Shit!”_

Finally, all was right in the world. We had our friends back and I had Steve in my arms. 

I reached between us and grabbed Steve’s dog tags, running my fingers over the silver surface, tracing his name and serial number. 

For the first time in my entire life, I felt like I just might have a shot at being truly happy. 

_“I love you Steve.”_

_”I love you too Sweetheart.”_


End file.
